Peppermint Bark

Damn that Williams- Sonoma catalog. I'm totally craving peppermint bark right now. May have to go to Millenia tomorrow and bring some home with me. And brave the mob at Ikea to see what's up with that. Girlchild and her high school friend M have found a funky little place to rent in a fun part of town, she is moving out and the place will need major decorating. She knows she's getting a fistful of gift cards for Christmas. She's working on Christmas so we will celebrate early, there are no surprises under the tree this year. Or even a tree, for that matter. I'll light a Christmas-y scented candle and call it a day.

December starts tomorrow? November flew by all high speed crazy, insane job stress and such, but I do have a few small accomplishments to show for it.

Number of trips to the gym: Um, ZERO. Yeah, I know, but I did walk the dogs and drag out the exercise mat in front of the tee-vee.

Not eating like a truck driver is going much better - after losing a pound or three on my own I realized that this was going unnecessarily slowly and I wasn't doing a good job of monitoring my portions, so about a week into November I joined Weight Watchers Online. Total pounds lost since around the week before Halloween = 8. That's 3 on my own plus 5 on WW. I'm pleased. I think I am finally Mature Enough to really function on WW - I appreciate the simplicity of the system. Yes, I can have Peppermint Bark as long as it is accounted for in the overall intake. Makes sense to me.

I'm very big on intake denial - I think most people who have put on weight are. I got into a fascinating (in a multi-car pileup sort of way) discussion of weight issues on Ravelry, and among the things I took away from it is that a lot of fat people eat healthy diets and exercise - I have come to believe that the usual suspects of fast food and the crappy American processed food diet are not as big a factor as the insidious lack of a grip on portion size, or rather, the ignoring of same. I know that I am guilty of this. I rarely eat junk, eat fast food maybe 3x a year - my downfall is ignoring the reality that even "healthy food" can make you weigh too much if you don't pay attention to portions. So that's where the accountability of WW is helping me - I'm actually thinking about (but not obsessively measuring) portions. I was so frustrated - going to the gym and really working out 3 to 5 times a week, really putting in the effort, not just standing around chatting, and yet the pounds weren't coming off. It couldn't be my fault, it must be my middle-aged metabolism and all that crap.

Yet I am vain, and not willing to throw in the towel and admit that nobody over 40 can ever be considered attractive so why bother (an actual position taken in the debate - it truly shocked me damn near speechless) so early this month I decided to give Weight Watchers a shot. I know I'll never make it to meetings regularly, who am I kidding, so I am using the online tools. I started looking at the quantity I was eating and hey, guess what? It really WAS my fault I wasn't losing weight. When I look at how much I was eating in terms of WW points, it's a miracle I am not much, much heavier. I can't fault my metabolism, it has been working away trying to keep up with the intake.

And now the scale is moving, and it is not hard to do, and I'm very pleased with the results. And tomorrow I will buy a small tin of peppermint bark and eat a wee bit of it each day as a treat, and count it as part of my points, and walk the dogs and drag out the Pilates mat. And it's easy, and it's working. Even if I haven't made it to the gym.

But after Girlchild and my Granddog leave for their cute new home, I will make Murphy very happy by resuming our old tradition of Dawn Patrol Dog Walks, and an evening walk too. I don't have time in the morning to walk both dogs, not if I am going to consume my daily requirement of morning coffee so I don't drown in the shower - but I can manage one dog. He'll be fine with being an Only Dog again, and I'll adjust. Though as I type this my granddog is on the couch next to me, and I know I'm gonna cry when he leaves. But I'll adjust, and plan my own escape to a cute little place that will cost me half what this house costs to operate, and a different job that isn't going to kill me, and new clothes, and maybe a little FUN in 2008. Because 2001-2007 haven't been much fun.

I can't say it was all that bleak. I know it's hard to imagine that I did have fun when you look at the list of The Shit that Happened to Catherine, but I did have fun. The fun was a nice little break from the Shit Avalanche. I'd like the fun to become a bit more routine in 2008.